Before coming into SA, I didn’t believe that lust was a big deal for me. I had masturbated all my life, sometimes using pornography. When my addiction was in full swing, I was acting out with other men four to six times a month. I was living what I thought was a successful double life—on one hand a successful educator, father, husband, and church leader, and on the other a committed sex addict. I could lean into the stressors of career, family or church, and seem to others to be wise and a courageous leader. But later, I would relieve the emotional pressure by acting out sexually. Except for the burdensome guilt and shame, the pattern seemed to be working.
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