Thursday Apr 10, 2025
ESSAY April 2025 - The Gift of Desperation - Amr R., Mansoura, Egypt
ESSAY Magazine (An International Journal of Sexaholics Anonymous)
The mission of ESSAY is to serve as a source of information, experience, strength and hope to sexaholics, both inside and outside the rooms of Sexaholics Anonymous. Our vision is to provide a high-quality “meeting in print” that gathers together members from around the world. It can serve as a portable “extra meeting” especially for loners and for members who don’t have access to many meetings. In addition, Essay serves as an outreach tool to carry the message to those who have not yet found SA. We strive to include a mix of stories and shares from a wide variety of members, including men and women, prisoners, and international members. In addition, ESSAY provides Fellowship announcements and information on subjects such as new meetings, Fellowship events, and our service structure. We hope that all of the articles we publish will offer useful information and provide experience, strength, and hope to all who suffer from the disease of sexaholism. Fellowship actvities such as international conventions, regional events and local events appear in the Calendar section. Each issue has a theme and various sections to share sexaholic stories and practical tools. In addition to letters and group news, ESSAY offers short, edited articles written by members about recovery and our solution. The Practical Recovery Tools section features members sharing on the topic, “Exactly how I did it.” Submissions may also include meditations, poetry, and humor. ESSAY is guided by the principles of the Twelve Steps, Twelve Traditions and Twelve Concepts. Each issue contains the following statement:
Listen on:
Episodes
Episodes
Thursday Apr 10, 2025
Thursday Apr 10, 2025
Lust was always a part of me, long before I knew its name. It had claimed me as one of its own in the darkness that would become my sexaholism—a universe-sized prison of my own making. My disease was quietly progressive. Some might argue that I haven’t hit my real rock bottom since my life has never been completely upended by my many relapses.
Tuesday Mar 11, 2025
Tuesday Mar 11, 2025
“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” (Step Three)
My family of origin was one of spirituality and firm belief in God. I was taught right from wrong but believed this meant God only loved me if I was doing right. As I grew older and became further trapped in my addiction, I began to live a two-faced life—one of joy on the outside but with a dark secret of shame-filled lust trapped on the inside.
Tuesday Mar 11, 2025
Tuesday Mar 11, 2025
This member’s understanding of God may be unique to him, but he still strives to live our common Twelve Step principles
When I first came into the Program, I had a problem with the italicized qualifier on God, “as we understood Him” (SA, 208). Now I see it as the best idea of the Twelve Steps.
My problem was, being very devout in the religion I was raised in, I was sure that God was God, He didn’t change according to how someone understood Him, and my understanding happened to be the correct one. I had no concept of the Set Aside Prayer or the principle of surrender at that time.
Tuesday Mar 11, 2025
Tuesday Mar 11, 2025
This personal experience at the EMER Convention was scheduled for publication in the December 2024 issue of the ESSAY but had to be saved for this issue. Be sure to listen to the author’s interview on the December 2024 episode of, “ESSAY Conversations: Beyond the Page” at essay.sa.org/get-involved/essay-podcast.
Tuesday Feb 25, 2025
Tuesday Feb 25, 2025
These are my experiences as a woman of lusting and interacting with male fellows in SA, both in person and virtually. I’ve been in SA for four years and am two years sober as of this writing. I’m a single widow in my 50s.
I have three points to share as I begin:
First, SA, the acceptance story (AA, 407-420), and my sponsor show that my experiences and thoughts might be totally wrong for someone else. So please receive it or forget it as seems appropriate for you.
Saturday Feb 22, 2025
Saturday Feb 22, 2025
אני בן 50 וגר בפולין, מפוכח מאז שנת 2011. הגעתי לחברותא בשנת 2007. תקופת המפוכחות המשמעותית הראשונה שהייתה לי ארכה שנתיים וחצי החל מאפריל של 2008. ואז מצאתי את עצמי בבית חולים פסיכיאטרי מאובחן עם דיכאון חמור. שמה איבדתי את המפוכחות שלי, אך מייד ביקשתי שוב את עזרת החברותא ומצאתי ספונסר. התחלתי את התכנית מחדש. מאז ועד היום אני מפוכח
Saturday Feb 22, 2025
Saturday Feb 22, 2025
שמי אנה, ואני גרה במקסיקו. אני מודה לאלוהים על הנס של עזיבת ההתנהגויות הממכרות שלי, אותם דפוסי תאווה שהחזיקו אותי בעבדות במשך שש שנים. הרגשתי לחלוטין שבויה בדרישות התאווה, לא מסוגלת להתנגד גם כשרציתי. בשלושת החודשים האחרונים, עם זאת, הבנתי שההחלמה שלי חורגת הרבה מעבר לסתם להפסיק. אלוהים העניק לי שליטה עצמית, שלווה, מתינות, משמעת ותקווה לעתיד. הוא מעולם לא מנע ממני אף אחת מהמתנות האלה כשביקשתי בכנות. אלוהים נתן לי אותן בנדיבות וללא נזיפה
Saturday Feb 22, 2025
Saturday Feb 22, 2025
סיפור אישי זה מהכנס EMER היה אמור להתפרסם בגיליון דצמבר 2024 של ה ESSAY- אך נדחה לגיליון זה.
חשבתי רבות על כתיבת מאמר בנוגע לשירות ולחברותא, כיוון ששניהם השפיעו עמוקות על פיכחוני והחלמתי ב-20 החודשים האחרונים. תוך כדי כתיבת מאמר זה, אני יושב בנמל התעופה בווינה, מחכה לעלות על טיסה ללונדון, שם אבלה שבוע בחברת חברי הקהילה המפוכחים שלי (חברים בהחלמה)