ESSAY Magazine (An International Journal of Sexaholics Anonymous)

came into Sexaholics Anonymous at age 31. I am 55 today. I’ve seen a lot of women come and go. Based on behaviors I’ve experienced during those 25 years, I’d like to share some practical recovery tools how I treat the opposite sex at our mixed meetings:
I don’t exchange numbers with members of the opposite sex—especially if married.
I don’t touch another person without first asking permission.
I don’t invite a male member to spend time outside of the meeting—especially if married.
I don’t chat with members of the opposite sex on Zoom calls—especially if married.
I don’t comment on another person’s face, clothing, body, or overall appearance—I know that people who have been abused are especially very sensitive to this.

Hi, I'm Karin W., a woman sexaholic, and on 27 June '23, I landed in SA. My sobriety date is Sept 1, 2023. I have a SA in-person home group, attend Zoom SA meetings, work the 12 Steps with a SA sponsor and do SA Correctional Facilities Committee (CFC) service work. Also, I'm committed to 'no' dating or getting into a relationship for a year, minimum. Before SA, I wanted to die.

There’s a saying, “Recovery is peace and serenity in the midst of the storm.” And Priscilla has known many storms. Today, after more than 30 years of sexual sobriety, she has tools to stay the course during storms.
Priscilla C., from Nashville, Tennessee, has been sober since February 7, 1993. She was sent to Sexaholics Anonymous by her therapist. “My forms of acting out were predominantly with married or emotionally-unavailable men. I’d had a series of relationships with people I worked with, and every time, I said I’d never do it again. I made sure it’d only be with someone out of state, but, of course, that was just part of my rationalization. I had an affair with a guy that I only saw twice a year, but we talked a lot on the phone. One time we agreed to meet in another state, but when we did, he seemed very distant. The next day he said he didn’t want to see me again—that he didn’t want the affair and that I forced him into it.

I’ve been sober since January 7, 2023. That day I took a flight to South Africa (SA), so I literally traveled to a new life since then. God has an amazing sense of humor! 
FIRST STOP: Bogotá. 
September 2014: One Friday night I called SA because I had done something that ashamed me profoundly. “Why can’t I stop? Why do my relationships not last? What is wrong with me?” I still remember the understanding male voice telling me there was a solution for me. However, the sobriety definition seemed too strict for me: “It is impossible for a young and pretty woman. Youth is a synonym for parties, boyfriends, and joy. By that time, lust was still my friend.”

A man… got blinds to the windows; what can’t stand daylight?His front yard looks desolate, a jungle downright!A man… day after day, an all nighter tooHis addiction to porn is the one trick he can do That man… lonely, neglected, afraid, feels rejected One day… he can’t stop the habit, it’s having him hooked He’s looking for havoc, it’s having him nooked

 
اوایل ورودم به اس ای، زمانی که راجع به جلسات مختلط مطلع شدم، فکر کردم اگر در جلسه ای باشم که اعضای آن، ذهنی مثل ذهن من داشته باشند،آنجا مثل یک پارتی خواهد شد.به عنوان یک زنبانوان رفتم و تصور می کردم یک معتاد جنسی که با جنس مخالف تعامل دارد، دیوانه است و مجبور است راجع به ضربات شهوتی که برای او به همراه دارد، به خودش دروغ بگویدمخالف تعامل دارد، دیوانه است و مجبور است راجع به ضربات شهوتی که برای او به همراه دارد، به خودش دروغ بگوید.

 
سلام، من کارین هستم، یک معتادجنسی خانم، و در ۲۷ ژوئن ۲۰۳۳ به اس ای پیوستم. تاریخ هوشیاریای،دلم میخواست بمیرم است. من یک گروه حضوری خانگی اس ای دارم، در جلسات زوم اس ای شرکت میکنم، دوازده قدم را با یک راهنمای اس ای کار میکنم و کارهای خدماتی کمیته اصلاح و تربیت اس ای را انجام می دهم .همچنین، من متعهد به "نه" قرار ملاقات یا وارد شدن به یک رابطه برای حداقل یک سال هستم. من قبل از اس ای،دلم میخواست بمیرم

 
من از سال ۲۰۱۰ در این برنامه بوده‌ام. برنامه به من این امکان را داد که ۱۳ سال پاک بمانم و از اینکه از من خواسته شد مقاله‌ای درباره مردان و زنان در جامعه بنویسم، بسیار سپاسگزارم